Restarting intelligence

We begin. Each day, with memories of yesterday. Good memories. Bad too. That's our school bag, as we leave for work. Heavy if we have a big memory system in our head, light if we are the forgetful type.

I begin each day light, and I know I am right. I spent the last four months or so, in a cave. Not officially, but in spirit. I took a leave from whatever I had to do. Took a leave from all the pressing problems. To take a step back, to regroup. To understand what I have done to date, and to organize, for what I am to be tomorrow.

Deserve respect.

The break worked wonders, or at least that’s how I am going to sell it for the moment. Today, was the second consecutive working day, when yours truly, was on-time for office. For the record, never before had I been on-time for office.

I truly deserve a timely pat on my back. Well done bro!

Ear rings.

This has been like week three. My right ear has been down. My fault. I wanted it all clean. So, I pushed that small finger right till the end of the ear-hole. So here, we are today, I can hear only 20% of the sound dB (decibels) you generate.

So, the moment I enter the room of my office today, my colleague, Ms.Tahira asks, “How’s that ear now?”, and I respond after trying hard to hear with that 1/5th of an ear, “Bad, very bad. There’s pain today.” She’s like, “Oh.”

Ear crackles. Rings. There’s fluid moving from left to right ear. Law of continuity:

Flow in = Flow out

Oh God, help!


The whole day of office work is traumatized by all sorts of phones ringing. Landlines, 19th century Nokias, Iphones, Skypes, and what not. Buzz, buzz, buzzzzzzzzzzzZZZZ.

My colleague on the right, is the biggest culprit. Say twenty calls a day, 15 missed calls. And hundreds of text messages. All this I presume, and exaggerate, as I recall, and write. Its pure, ringing pain.

So, I try to flip her iPhone the next time it rings. And voila! It keeps ringing. Hey, no fair. All iPhones go mum once flipped, what’s wrong with this one.

As she arrives back on her table, I tell her that her iPhone is a fake, since it keeps ringing even on flip.

The deal

I had this car wash deal with the office clerk last week. He would clean my car, twice a week, and I shall pay him PKR 250 per month ($2.75/month). A good deal for me, since this would keep my car shiny white all week long.

All great men have nice, clean cars, right?

So, I request today this clerk to begin, and he responds, “I don’t have time today (Urdu: میرے پاس ٹائم نہیں ہے). Wow, what a service. Truly reliable.

Killing the heat

We are having a heat wave in Karachi. The city is oven hot. And here’s how you kill the heat: Confuse it!

So, I think up of new ways to cover myself up. I tried the dupatta at a wedding in my village. It nearly burned my neck. But, I felt spectacular photographically.

Next, I want to wear ties. Plain shirt, and bright ties. That would surely beat the dupatta look, fair and square.

Reminder: the air conditioner in our office does not work, and there are 8 people in our small office room.

Reminder 2: The second reminder is that I presently do not have a plain shirt to go with a tie. Hence, there’s some shopping to do first.

Green things back home

Once home, I tend my garden. Its like juggling twenty balls all at the same time. I make a sad clown juggling them. Little success, tonnes of failure.

A lot of the plants are drooping the wrong way. The grass, its receding fast. What comes in plenty are plants with thorny stems, creating more threat, and less beauty.

And then I look around, there are places where grass is not required, and yet it somehow, magically springs up. Concrete. How can it possibly do that? So not fair.


Fresh Prince of Bell Air

Nostalgia: Remember the good ol’ days when we were young. Remember that comedy drama with that song. I used to sing it as it aired. Always.

Yet, there were only four words I understood: ‘Fresh Prince of Bell Air’, for all else, I made the ‘whoosh, wish’ sound.

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Arificial routine is a place where I write with freedom, writing about the day to day things. There are no benchmarks to be met. Just me writing regularly about my university life in Karachi, Pakistan.


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